Monday, July 25, 2016

Week 029 - I Have Recently Mastered The Steak... You May Be Doing It Wrong

Hey Fam! 

This week has been nutz! "We have no food, we have no jobs, our pet’s heads are falling off!"

We started off this week fantastic with a zone conference, pretty much announcing to us from the president that we are the only mission with a siesta, so take it! Vamos! I was just commanded to take a nap! Vamos Santa Fe!

After 6 months, I have come to know what some missionaries may not learn until the end of their missions; that the Argentinians have this magic power where they can change subject through a conversation without you knowing. For example, Mr. Gaucho Man; he’s the worst of it, and he doesn’t have any real point to what he is saying. He’s the girl you wish you hadn’t started a conversation with at a party (SNL). I’ll be like "Dario, do you believe in God?" Dario: "Ha, there are millions of kilometers from the earth to the sun. And the sun will be over there in 5 hours, and there are people who don’t get the sun living in igloos. How can they survive in igloos?" Me: "Well maybe they adapted to their surroundings.” Dario: "Ha  there are people that can climb palm trees picking off coconuts as high as buildings. How could there be enough to go around?" Me: "Wait why aren’t there enough coconuts?" Dario: "Ha coconuts. They don’t need coconuts, they eat dogs and their own kind." Me:"Wait, are we still talking about people?" Dario: “Of course, they are all over Africa." Me: "Africa?" Dario: "Claro! It’s unjustified what happened." Me: "What happened?” Dario: "Do you know who ended slavery?" Me: "Abraham Lincoln?" Dario: "JOHN F KENNEDY." Me: "Oh, alright Dario." Dario: "But that Jorgito Bush, now that is a power family, father and grandfather were presidents!" Man… at least he gives us mandarins.

Check it… since I don’t see a dentist anymore, I thought it was appropriate to try out...The Floss. So I totally floss twice a day. Dr. Lan would be so pumped.

One of the worst things about the dogs here is that they go after all the trash, especially the baby diapers, way gross. But we also thought it should be appropriate to give it a name, Second Harvest. Lots of second harvests going around.

As for the investigators, this week we found a new guy named Mario. He’s totally Italian. We had a great moment where he was visiting with Mirta, and we had asked Mirta if we could come over, and he asked if he could stay to get to know us. He talked about the rough life he has had, and we promised blessings and happiness in the church; and he wants to learn. So this is super cool.

We had a funny lesson with Manuel, where he went off on how everyone can have guns in the US, and I have hundreds of guns. One of the perks of being a U.S. citizen I guess. He was just going off on all the racks of guns I have. But I was like, "I don’t even own a gun. Let alone many guns that would necessitate an entire gun rack!"

Hermano Pujol was telling me some crazy story he had the other day; he was pretty pumped to tell us the story. I guess he was on a bus that stopped, and the door wouldn’t open, and everyone was kind of in a struggle of what’s going on. So I guess he decides to go up to the bus driver and say, "Do you believe in Jesus Christ?" And the bus driver said, “Yeah.” And Pujol pointed at the door and said, "Then by the power of Jesus Christ open that door!" And it opened. I was like wow. And he just smiles, lifts up his head, closes his eyes and says, "Estos la fe yo tengo," shaking his head. Sweet Hermano.

I believe I have recently mastered the steak. Why? Because I talk to many people with asadors. I get the best tips from the best. And I will be willing to release my secrets. First you will go to the carneceria (bring money, it may be essential). You choose your steak; not too fatty or it will be too gross. If you choose without fat... YOU ARE DOING IT WRONG. Now you’ve got your steak, and you are going to eat it that day; not tomorrow or yesterday. Or… YOU ARE DOING IT WRONG. Bring it home and put it on the table if you’re having it for lunch; in the fridge if for dinner. If you’ve put it in the freezer… YOU ARE DOING IT WRONG. You leave it out. Room temperature. If it’s too cold… YOU ARE DOING IT WRONG. Now you cook, sprinkle some salt on it; nothing else. You will not need any kind of rub if you are doing this right, or else… YOU ARE DOING IT WRONG. Now it is time for cooking; you are watching the sides, not the center, Ecoli can’t go to the center. If you are watching the center… YOU ARE DOING IT WRONG. Now you should notice, once the sides are cooked that the steak is neither too red or without red, or else… YOU ARE DOING IT WRONG. Now if you have black pepper you may sprinkle a bit. Take it off to the cutting table. Did you cut it?... YOU ARE DOING IT WRONG. Let the juices settle. Now you can take your steak knife. Wait… did you just go for the steak sauce… YOU ARE DOING IT WRONG. If you followed my instructions right, you won’t need anything. Now this only works if you’re getting some dang good Argentinian meat.

That’s it for today. You guys are awesome.
Love your girl’s camp stories and good times!​

Photo: The gauchito gill mobile...






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